I ask myself this question all too often: Am I fighting a losing battle? Is it impossible for me to achieve my goals? What are my goals to begin with? What is it that I am trying to achieve and how can I possibly expect to achieve it if I can barely manage to get through some days? Am I kidding myself? No one succeeds in life who sits around or lies around moping because their life is not what they want it to be. No one succeeds in life who’s afraid to do what he or she must do in order to get to the next level.

I know what demons I struggle against. I know what impedes my progress:

• Fear
• Indecision
• Procrastination

I started a new business venture about a month ago. In order for me to have even a remote chance of succeeding in what I want to do with the project, I am going to have to work with other people, something that I have avoided doing because of my discomfort dealing with people. I get nervous when dealing with people, something that isn’t necessarily uncommon; but in my case the nervousness is extreme. It is something I have battled since my childhood and eventually gave up battling, chosing instead to avoid people and social situations.

Running a home business has made it easier to pretty much break away from the outside world and deal with people via the computer; but there are few home-based businesses that are multi-million dollar enterprises being operated singlehandedly by a lone reclusive individual.

For the last several years I have managed to get by running my home-business singlehandedly; but managing to get by is not my idea of succeeding. That is not my goal, to manage to get by for the rest of my life. But if I am to have any chance of actually achieving my goals, I am going to have to conquer my fear of dealing with people, or at least learn to mask it enough that I am able to deal with people as necessary in order to make happen the things that need to happen if I am to make a success of this new project.

In the past I have succumbed to fear. I ran away from it. I hid from it and I have tried since to live my life in a shell protected from the things I fear. As I face the reality of having a good chance to build something successful; but needing to step out of my confort zone, to face and conquer my fears, I often feel a sense of panic. And under the influence of that panic I begin to think of all the reasons why what I am trying to do has no chance of succeeding anyway. It’s the way I cave into the fear, the way I let fear determine whether I succeed or fail in life.